Obama has come up with a new plan to save the economy.
The following are instructions on how to make the equivalent of between $52,000 and $76,000 (or more) for at least two years, and possibly up to six years without working while living in your home for free. All paid for by leaching off the U.S. taxpayer.
Here’s how Obama’s plan works…
First, get unemployed (now that was easy, right?).
Second, stop paying your mortgage. This will come naturally to everyone who is already underwater on their mortgages (millions of people) and wants to stop paying anyway and those who are already in foreclosure (millions more people). It will take about 12 to 24 months for the bank to begin foreclosing on you. While you wait, enjoy your mortgage-free living. Then, when the bank gets serious, apply for the new Obama bailout plan and use the money to pay the mortgage.
That will buy you two more years of mortgage-free living. Then, since this bailout loan is non-recourse, simply stop paying your mortgage again. It will take the bank another 12 to 24 months to foreclose on you, at which point you can go rent. You won’t have to pay back the government loan and the bank can’t touch you.
Following this new plan from Obama, you should be able to continue living in your beautiful new house, surrounded by a bunch of stupid renters and responsible home owners for anywhere between four to six years, all for free while enjoying unemployment benefits for 99 weeks (and counting). Be sure to take advantage of the inevitable federal and state unemployment extensions after your 99 weeks are up.
My “income” figures are based on two years worth of unemployment insurance, savings associated with not paying a mortgage while the taxpayer pays it for you and the two to four years of living mortgage-free in a house while the bank forecloses on it. And of course, saving the 25% in taxes you aren’t giving on the money you aren’t earning for the mortgage you aren’t paying.
And don’t forget, Obama’s new plan provides taxpayer money for not only the principal and interest, but also your mortgage insurance, taxes and hazard insurance. Combined with your unemployment insurance, your inevitable tax refunds and tax credits, and “tax-free” mortgage payments, you’ll be “earning” a nice chunk of change.
Meanwhile, responsible home owners and renters who are still working will continue to provide the taxes necessary to support your mortgage-free & work-free lifestyle. In fact, since the equivalent income is so high from Obama’s new plan, I anticipate many people who are unemployed to actively avoid getting a job until they absolutely must. Why would they? They will make a lot more money from the government than if they went and started working. Yet another moral hazard of epic proportions, which I now believe is the only policy Obama knows how to make.
As reported by CNBC, Obama issues $1 Billion of tax payer money to these individuals. The loan is non-recourse which means if they decide to leave the house, they don’t have to pay the loan back. As yet, there is nothing in the law that explains how they will pay it back. Remember that these people are unemployed, so in a true sick and twisted fashion, Obama’s answer for people struggling with debt is to issue them more debt.
Meanwhile, I wait patiently for Obama’s Responsible Renter Bailout Program…